Sunday, January 8, 2012

Compliments


Yesterday I wore this fabulous pair of shoes.  Their very high heels are the only reason that I don't wear them more often because they really are great.

At the BBQ we attended I got several compliments, one of which led to a really interesting discussion on compliments.  I love compliments - although I'm much better at giving than receiving them.  On many occasions when I've seen a complete stranger who looks great I've complimented them.  I'm also a huge fan of the thank you note.  If I get some truly excellent service, I love to send a little note on to the company.

I recently read an article talking about the need for women to be more assertive.  If your coffee is cold - send it back, if the hotel room isn't what you wanted, ask to change.  I completely agree with this.  Too many of us put up with substandard service because we don't want to make a fuss.  As long as you are polite, it is usually fine to ask such things.

But if we are learning to become more proactive complainers, I think it is important that we also learn to be proactive praisers.

The person I was speaking to at the party aims to make one person (unrelated to her) smile every day.  I think that is a gorgeous mantra.  As she said it can be as simple as saying a welcoming hello to someone, or complementing a stranger on her shoes.  Imagine if we all did that, wouldn't the world be a happier place?

6 comments:

  1. Those are indeed great shoes - although I know I wouldn't be able to walk in them! - and I love this stance on compliments as well as assertion. I'm terrible at both, or at least not great at receiving compliments and not great at saying if something isn't right. I have got better with age though.

    Also, I've been meaning to say I love your new background :) Speedy updating it the other day!

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  2. Thanks Kari - both on the shoes and new background! I'm still working on both assertiveness and compliments, I think the key is just to be mindful of them.

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  3. I have a friend who I caught up with over the holidays (only see her once every 6-12 months) who never fails to make me feel so great about myself. She always tells me how happy and healthy I'm looking. After she also praised my mother's house and my boyfriend' awesomeness to each of them I realised what an incredible skill she has. Not only does she manage to praise people in a very sincere way, she finds something that you would take pride in or are self conscious about and makes you feel incredible.

    I'm going to try and be more like that.

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  4. Miss Directions - your friend sounds great. What a skill to make people feel so good about themselves. I think we can all take a lesson from that.

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  5. Oh, I do have a deep, deep love of pretty shoes, though I can't wear my fancy heels as much as I'd like because, well, heels. It's a hard life we lead ;) These are gorgeous! And yes, I agree with everything you say. I spent my teenage years unable to deal with compliments, partly because I disliked myself so much. But I'm absolutely into giving compliments willy-nilly these days, and it *does* bring so much happiness when you tell a stranger something nice, both to them and to you when you see their pleasure :)

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  6. Lovely message :) I so want to get back into the thank you note too. People so appreciate it!
    Heidi xo

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